This picture marks a time in my life when I had just begun to heal.
The Awakening
I became aware of the fact that my thoughts and beliefs were not in line with one another. This happened through the therapeutic support of pure essential oils that helped clear my thinking, all within a trustworthy community.
My brain needed release from stuck patterns, and I had to see others live in genuine, loving relationships. I needed to step away from my confusing life for a season so that clarity could come.
The Revelation That Changed Everything
I was so busy trying to be better, I never noticed that my trying was the very thing keeping everyone stuck.
Let that sink in for a moment.
All those years of working harder, doing more, carrying everyone’s burdens — it wasn’t helping. It was perpetuating a cycle that served no one, least of all the Lord I thought I was serving.
When “Doing” Becomes an Idol
Awareness of our behaviors, thoughts, and beliefs is not self-focus. It is integrity.
Jesus told us in Luke 6:46, “Why do you call me ‘Lord, Lord,’ and do not do what I say?” So we do more, but never stop to think if what we are doing is actually what He says.
It makes me think of God’s people in the Old Testament. They actually preferred being told what to do — have a set of rules or have a physical king to rule over them. They preferred that over simply being with their Creator. It seems we like to feel we did something to earn His favor.
Scriptures like this can be misunderstood with minds set on working for our goodness.
The Truth About Lordship
What I have learned is that when Jesus is Lord of our lives and we have spent time knowing His character and enjoying His presence, what we do naturally begins lining up with His ways.
It is more about accepting His love and surrendering our ways to His ways.
My Season of Striving
I spent years doing all the things a wife and mother should do. I listened to sermons, read books, implemented feedback from my husband and extended family, and talked to countless Biblical counselors. I thought I was obeying Jesus.
This led to me taking responsibility for myself and everyone else. I worked so hard to keep everyone else served that I never stopped to ask my Lord if that is what He wanted.
I was so busy “doing” that I forgot how to “be.”
A Word for Weary Mothers
I encourage weary mothers today to get alone for a bit each day, and let Him lead your life. He will bring awareness to your confusion.
Ask yourself: Are you “carrying one another’s burdens” that are actually not yours to carry? Does that really mean what you think it means?
Sometimes the most loving thing we can do is step back and let others carry what’s theirs to carry.
Sometimes the most obedient thing we can do is rest in His presence instead of working for His approval.
Sometimes healing begins when we stop trying so hard to be better and start surrendering to His better way.
What has the Lord been whispering to your heart about the difference between striving and surrendering? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments below.